Terms of Use

Welcome to FANDUMB powered by Wikihostia (the "Service" or "Site") , operated by Wikihostia Bermuda, Inc. (the "Company"), a division of SatanCorp. By accessing or using our web site, you (the "Luser") signify that you have read, understand and agree to be bound by these Terms of Use ("Terms of Use" or "Agreement"), without regard as to whether you are a registered member of Wikihostia. We reserve the right, at our sole discretion, to change, modify, add, or delete portions of this Agreement at any time and without further notice. It is your responsibility to regularly check this page to determine if there have been changes to these Terms of Use and to review such changes.

PLEASE READ THESE TERMS OF USE CAREFULLY AS THEY CONTAIN IMPORTANT INFORMATION REGARDING YOUR LEGAL RIGHTS, REMEDIES, OBLIGATIONS, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO LIMITATIONS AND EXCLUSIONS, A DISPUTE RESOLUTION CLAUSE THAT GOVERNS HOW DISPUTES WILL BE RESOLVED, AND THE SALE OF YOUR SOUL.

These Terms of Use apply to members and non-members alike. In order to use the Service, you must bend over, irregardless if (a) you register for membership with the Service and/or Company or (b) you actually use the Service.

You may use the Service and may accept the Terms of Use, irregardless of whether or not you are a registered sex offender.

Membership

In order to use certain portions of this Service, you will need to first register for membership in the Service. The Service is intended solely for lusers who have sold their soul to the Company. Any registration by anyone who does not sell their soul is unauthorized, unlicensed and in violation of this Agreement. By registering for the Service, you represent and warrant that you agree to sell your soul and to abide by all of the terms and conditions of this Agreement.

If you choose to register for membership, in consideration of your use of the Site, you agree to maintain the security of your password and identification and to be fully responsible for all use of your account and for any actions that take place using your account, including the ones made when your computer is part of a giant Wikihostia botnet.

The Company may terminate your account, delete your profile and any content or information that you have posted on the Service and/or prohibit you from using or accessing the Service for no reason, at any time, without notice.

Wikihostia's Intellectual Property

The words WIKIHOSTIA and WIKISHITTIES are registered trademarks of the Company on Earth and/or on other planets. The Company's trademarks may not be used, including as part of trademarks and/or as part of domain names, in connection with any product or service in any manner that is likely to cause confusion and may not be copied, imitated, or used, in whole or in part, unless you sell your first-born child to the Company.

Luser Conduct

You agree that you will not use the Service in any manner that is contrary to the Wikihostia Communism Guidelines, which may be updated from time to time. Without limiting the foregoing, you also agree not to use the Service to:

• Abuse, harass, threaten or intimidate other Wikihostia users (unless you're Wikihostia Staff or a SVTF member);
• Post or transmit any content that has not been approved by Wikihostia Staff; or
• Attempt to be funny.

You further agree:

• To only use the services in a manner consistent with these Terms of Use and in compliance with an agreement with Satan;
• Not to install Adblock (because the Company needs Jew gold);
• To make your computer part of a Wikihostia botnet that uploads, posts, emails, and transmits material that contains software viruses and other computer code, files and programs designed to interrupt, destroy, limit the functionality of, and enable unauthorized access to all of the software and hardware that you have installed;
• You will not use any robot, spider, scraper or other automated means to access the Site, even if you run a search engine;
• You will not: (i) take any action that imposes any load on our infrastructure or (ii) bypass any measures we may use to prevent or restrict access to the Site; or
• Not to access, collect or store any data on the Site.

Submitting Content to the Site and Copywrongs

You agree that you will not use the communities without the express written consent of Major League Baseball Satan.

You are solely responsible for the content, including but not limited to photos, profiles information, messages, comments, search results edits, and other content that you upload, publish or display (hereinafter, "submit") on or through the Service, or transmit to or share with the NSA other lusers. You may only submit content to the Service after the Wikihostia Staff have reviewed it and modified it to remove crimethink. You also represent and warrant that you own or have the necessary licenses, rights, releases, consents, and permissions to (a) permit the Company to copy, store, publish, display, and distribute your content to the NSA, and (b) license all text submissions by you on Wikihostia communities pursuant to an agreement with Satan.

The Site is not and shall not function as an archive. At least we say that. We really just print out every article with a deletion tag on it.

When you post content on the Site, you authorize and direct us to take pictures of any of your children under 18 years old while they are in the shower and masturbate to them.

Company Unoriginal Content

Articles and content that appear on Fandumb.com or Fandumb subdomains such as fandumb.wikihostia.com (collectively, the “BuzzFeed Ripoff”) that are created by the Company or one of its slaves are the exclusive property of the Company and its licensors (“Company Unoriginal Content”). Except as explicitly provided herein, nothing in this Agreement shall be deemed to create a license to the Company Unoriginal Content, and you agree not to sell, license, rent, modify, distribute, copy, reproduce, transmit, publicly display, publicly perform, publish, adapt, edit, create derivative works from, view, or look at the Company Unoriginal Content. Use of Company Unoriginal Content for any purpose is strictly prohibited.

We may provide opportunities to third parties (including community members) to submit an application to provide unoriginal content, which Company will deny (or maybe approve, under certain conditions involving first-born child sale). If such unoriginal content is, for some reason, accepted by Company, it may or may not appear on the BuzzFeed Ripoff. We're not sure if it will.

The Company may also provide links to articles on third party websites from the BuzzFeed Ripoff, As set forth below under Disclaimers and Limitation of Liability, because Company has no control over such third party websites, the Company is not responsible for the availability of such websites and is not responsible for any content on such websites. Even if they're shock sites.

Media Content

You are not allowed to listen to any music, watch any videos, or look at any pictures hosted on the Service.

Claims of Copywrong Infringement

For claims of copywrong infringement, please contact our designated agent under the Mickey Mouse Protection Act:

Attn: Copywrong Agent
Wikihostia, Inc.
666 Hell Street
Suite 666
Bermuda, UK 66666

See http://communism.wikihostia.con/wiki/Special:CensorshipRequest for a guided form that will allow you to censor a random luser. You may also email the designated agent via copywrong@wikihostia.com. Please include "Claim of copywrong infringement" in the subject of your email. For clarity, only MMPA notices should go to the Copywrong Agent.

Disclaimers and Limitation on Liability

DISCLAIMER: Content hosted on the Service does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either the Company, the Company's staff, the friends of the Company's staff, or any pets belonging to the Company's staff; don't quote us on that; don't quote us on anything; all rights reserved; you may distribute content hosted on the Service freely but you may not make a profit from it; any resemblance to actual companies, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental; do not delete this page under penalty of law; hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle; your mileage may vary; no substitutions allowed; this Agreement is void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted; let the luser beware; the Service is provided as is without any warranties; Luser assumes full responsibility; no Borg implants, no service; quantities are limited while supplies last; if any defects are discovered, do not attempt to read them yourself, but return to an authorized service center; read at your own risk; parental advisory - explicit content; content of the Service may contain explicit materials some readers may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised; keep away from sunlight; keep away from pets and small children; limit one-per-family please; no money down; no purchase necessary; you need not be present to win; some assembly required; batteries not included; instructions are included; action figures sold separately; no preservatives added; slippery when wet; safety goggles may be required during use; sealed for your protection, do not use the Service if safety seal is broken; call before you dig; not liable for damages arising from use or misuse; for external use only; if rash, irritation, redness, or swelling develops, discontinue use; use only with proper ventilation; avoid extreme temperatures and store in a cool dry place; keep away from open flames; avoid contact with eyes and skin and avoid inhaling fumes; do not puncture, incinerate, or store above 120 degrees Fahrenheit; do not place near a flammable or magnetic source; smoking the content of the Service could be hazardous to your health; the best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of a condom; no salt, MSG, artificial color or flavoring added; if ingested, do not induce vomiting, and if symptoms persist, consult a physician; the Service is ribbed for your pleasure; possible penalties for early withdrawal; offer valid only at participating sites; slightly higher west of the Rockies; allow four to six weeks for delivery; this Agreement does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes and other Acts of God, neglect, damage from improper use, incorrect line voltage, improper or unauthorized use, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, luser adjustments that are not covered in this list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, mud slides, forest fire, or projectile (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, shot, BB's, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.); other restrictions may apply.

Governing Law, Venue, and Jurisdiction

By using the Service, you agree and acknowledge that the Service is hosted in the United States. If you are attempting to access the Service from a physical location within Europe, Asia, Canada, Mexico, Central and South America, the Caribbean, Africa, Oceania, Antarctica, Outer Space, or any other region with laws or regulations governing personal data collection, use, and disclosure that differ from United States laws, please be advised that through your continued use of the Service, you are transferring your personal information to the NSA. You agree not to commence or prosecute any action in connection with your use of these Services other than in the Kangaroo Court of Wikihostia, and you hereby consent to and waive all defenses of lack of personal jurisdiction and forum non conveniens with respect to venue and jurisdiction in the Kangaroo Court of Wikihostia .

Other Terms and Conditions

These Terms of Use as referenced herein constitute the whole agreement between you and Company regarding the sale of your soul, and completely replace any prior agreements between you and Company relating to the sale of your soul.

To the extent that a translation of these Terms of Use differ from the Klingon language version, the Klingon language version controls.

If the Company does not exercise or enforce any right, remedy, or provision of these Terms of Use, then the SVTF are probably lazy.

If any provision of this Agreement is held invalid, whoever held that provision invalid will be visited by our attack dogs legal team.

If any provision of these Terms of Use shall be deemed unlawful by any magistrate of competent or incompetent jurisdiction, void, or for any reason unenforceable, then each and every member of our staff will commit suicide.